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Melissa

I have this amazing  friend and a fellow Pisces called Melissa. The girl is nothing short of brilliant: she’s a model having already been crowned Miss India-Kenya; she’s a spectacular photographer (I’m sure you’ve seen her Imagined photography page on facebook and her posters in the malls); she’s a super lyricists who has entered international music writing competitions and made it to the top quartile; and she’s a gifted singer that puts those lyrics to work w her soulful voice that sounds like butter melting on warm velvet. As her Twitter handle says: she does it all! And the cherry on top is that she has a different identity for each part of her. The voices in my head approve! However, like all humans, my dear sweet generous friend is not at all perfect. There is something very wrong with her: her sense of smell is broken!!!

That is the only reason I have to explain her amore for Amouage. What is Amouage you ask? Amouage is a range of insanely robust fragrances by an Omani brand by the same name. The kinds of scents that would knock you down to your knees instead of sweep you off your feet! Violent fragrances Wallahi. At least to me. See Melissa told me about her new found passion: perfume! I was all thrilled and giddy because I loooooove perfume: blame my father and sister for this potente obsession I have with divine redolence. She told me about her discovery of Amouage and offered to send me some samples so that we could compare notes (pun intended). I asked her about what kind of scents they were and she mentioned Arabic. I pulled the hand-break at that point and informed her that I’m not a fan of such but she assured me that Amouage are special, not the ususal stifling disgusting Arab and oriental aromas I’ve grown up exposed to (thanks to the cultures I have been raised in). I was weary but I succumbed to her infectious excitement and so she sent me the package. There began my nose woes!

the samples Melissa sent me (courtesy of Google)

I took a whiff of each sample bottle she had sent me and I almost got maruhani (spirits that possess you) because the smell was just sickly strong! I got dizzy and nauseous and utterly lost my appetite! That crystallized my abhorrence of Arab scents. I rushed to Twitter to explicitly condemn them to her and did not stop my tirade until I felt guilty over being such an ingrate. I was being very inconsiderate when she had spent time and money to share her love with me. So I decided to just go ahead and suffer in the name of a friendship that means a lot to me: I tried the range. I actually wore them *shudders* on my skin *passes out at the memory* just for her *goes to heaven for being very noble and self-sacrificing* *cue sounds of harps playing* I did all this in my room when alone so that I could die of olfactory overload without putting others through the horror of witnessing murder at the hands on a 2ml bottle of Amouage. I promised Melissa my review and here it goes:

AMOUAGE DIA

From Fragrantica

Main Accords – floral, woody, aldehydic, powdery, rose.

Song: Top notes of fig; cyclamen (what?); bergamot; tarragon (sounds like hell no?); sage & violet (must have meant violent) leaves. Middle notes of precious and fresh flowers including peach blossom; rose oil (*throws up all over keyboard*); orange flower (stop lying there was nothing citric about this scent); peony (peeeeyyyyoooouuu you mean); and orris.The base notes are woodsy rich and oriental (dies all over again) consisting of white musk; mysterious incense (headache nayo?); vanilla (I’m so sorry they put you in bad company beloved vanilla); heliotrope; cedarwood; sandalwood; and Guaiac wood.

Amouage Says

Epitomizing confidence and radiance, this is a (dooms) day wear fragrance that is vibrant (ahem! Violent!) and sophisticated- a perfect complement to amouage Gold.

Oshin Says

Seriously this was one bad mother-SHUT YOUR NOSE!!! I could barely tell the difference in notes as it transitioned from top to dry down. I no likey. I hatey!!!

Amouage Dia promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE MEMOIR

From Fragrantica 

Main accords – warm spicy, balmy, woody, smoky, fresh spicy.

Song: Top notes of cardamom; mandarin; orange; pink pepper & worm wood. The heart is made up of clove; incense; pepper; woody notes; jasmine; rose & white flower. The closing note has musk; French labdanum; oak moss; styrax & leather.

Amouage Says

Memoir’s notes of absinth, and precious woods allude to the timeless narrative of man and woman.

Melissa Says

“As you can see, this bottle is kinda almost empty. I ordered a new one ‘cos this is my fave. Memoir really doesn’t feel like perfume; I feel like it takes me to temples in faraway places. Really really love this…”

Oshin Says

This was very very strong! There was no escape from its strength. I reckon it must be the core of pepper spray! It did fade out to a bearable closure though and as I was reading a book at night I almost forgot I was wearing it. Those notes though: cardamom, clove, pepper. . .  KWANI NI PILAU!

Amouage Memoir promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE CIEL

From Fragrantica 

Main accords – floral, white floral, watery,balmy, woody.

Song: Top notes are cyclamen, gardenia and violet leaf; middle notes are peach blossom, jasmine, water lily and rose; base notes are sandalwood, amber, musk, incense and cedar.

Amouage Says

This fragrance bursts alive with rich floral scents. The silver frankincense and sensual woods leave an inner sense of serenity, reflecting the warmth of the sun.

Melissa Says

“Spring/Summer scent. Soft floral which goes citrusy, on my skin is like a light version of Honour. It stays pretty soft.”

Oshin Says

I have to be fair, Ciel was not as overbearing a fragrance as the rest of its ilk. It did not make me sick though it is not a bottle I would go out and pick as it’s floral nature would make me sick pretty fast. It wears off light though and is almost like a very bad impersonation of Channel Chance made in a high school chemistry lab by a drunken teenager who can’t afford real perfume for his girlfriend. I did not completely and utterly hate it.

Amouage Ciel promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE HONOUR

From Fragrantica 

Main accords – white floral, floral, animalistic, sweet, tuberose, balmy.

Song: Top notes are spices of pepper, rhubarb and coriander. The heart captures flowers of tuberose, jasmine, gardenia, lily of the valley and carnation. The base is oriental with notes of frankincense, vetiver, opoponax, amber and leather.

Amouage Says

Inspired by the tragic denouement of Madame Butterfly, Honour is a white flower with a dark heart.

Melissa Says

“White florals, slightly creamy, very strong.”

Oshin Says

Honour was the Mohammed Ali of the set: floats like a butterfly cloud of tear gas, stings stinks like a bee  pee! This scent packed some pretty heavy punches. My respiratory system, my skin, my clothes were all assaulted with the concentrated jasmine florals! Eiiiw! I had to wash this one off immediately! It killed me: 1st degree homicide! Is this honor I ask you?

*** Side note: I do love the story behind its design: unrequited love! Aree baba! So that’s what it smells like? No wonder the people who don’t love you back can’t stand you! You smell like Honour! *throws up stinky white flowers* “White flower with a dark heart!” Baghan kali!!! Sounds so good smells so bad!!! The poster is lovely though!

Amouage Honour promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE LYRIC

From Fragrantica 

Main accords – woody, warm spicy, balmy, floral, rose.

Song: Top notes are bergamot game with spices like ginger; cinnamon & saffron (BIRIYANI ANYONE?). The heart is made up of rose; angelica (more like Diabolica); jasmine; ylang-ylang; geranium & Iris root. The base finishes off the song with oak moss; sensual musk; woody accords; patchouli; vetiver; sandalwood; Touda bean; and incense.

Amouage Says

Beyond the transient beauty of Lyric lingers a song without a beginning or end. Inspired by the rose, Lyric is a floral oriental fragrance.

Oshin Says

Lingers is right. a very obnoxious fragrance that almost dares you to try and get rid of it if you dare! I dared. I failed. The rose essence was so bloody superior in this one and I HATE THE SMELL OF ROSES!!! It had a bite to it too: spicy! Would have been nice minus the rose! Oh, who am I kidding there is nothing nice about it! And as for not having a beginning or an end. . .  let’s just say I don’t remember when it hit me and when I got knocked the fuck out! This is the Lyric sung to a death knell sounding! *mourns my deceased sense of smell* Hated it!

Amouage Lyric promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE REFLECTION

From Fragrantica 

Main accords – floral, woody, green, white floral, balmy.

Song: Top notes include water violet & purple freesia with a hint of green tropical leaves. The middle note captures the “royal couple” of splendid magnolia and the king of seduction (please stop lying to people): Jasmine blossom. It closes with oriental, warm and noble base notes of cedar; sandalwood and amber.

Amouage Says

Reflection opens with a lush green freshness reminiscent of morning dew in the spring time. It is a perfume that expresses the inner self (by making you vomit all your innards!)

Melissa Says

“Put together water and flowers, and you have this. I like it a lot.”

Oshin Says

Honestly this was my least unfavorite of all. I could accommodate it only after I got over the fact that it was yet another Amouage weapon of mass mucus membrane destruction! It is a very crisp bouquet. Maybe too crisp but it’s better than the rest of the collection. I could be forced/tricked/beguiled/tortured/drugged  into wearing this again at a cultural wedding (to keep them from making me wear that other Eau de H’orrible they always pass around). The jasmine was not as repulsive and Alhamdulillah blessed be it did not have rose in it!

Amouage Reflection promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE GOLD

From Fragrantica 

Main accords – woody, balmy, floral, smoky.

Song: Top notes of wild rose; lilly of the valley; and silver frankincense. The heart contains myrrh; orris; and jasmine with the base ending it in amber; civet; musk; cedarwood; and sandalwood.

Amouage Says

This rich floral fragrance is made for the most special evening occasion- rich in splendor and sophistication.

Melissa Says

“Considered to be Amouage’s classic scent; known to be strong. Wear this for a very important evening out! LOL!”

Oshin Says

INTENSE!!! *catches breath* A very complicated scent my God! It was oscillating between I’M SORRY I’M SO REPULSIVE and WHAT THE FUCK!? so fast I got a lot disoriented. The voices in my head got muted. I think one of them actually ran away from me. I have never hated anything with the word “gold” in it so much. It not sophisticated it is pretentious and probably something Sarah Palin or Kola Boof would wear in a bid to class themselves up! After Lyric, Gold is next in line for exile from the land of the breathing in my world. nobody should be allowed to blend such  copious amounts of rose, myrrh, jasmine and sandalwood together. This is like the Frankenstein of fragrances.

Amouage Gold promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

AMOUAGE JUBILATION 25

From Fragrantica

Main accords – woody, balmy, warm spicy, sweet, cinnamon.

Song: Top notes are orange, coriander, labdanum, tarragon, olibanum and blackberry; middle notes are guaiac wood, cinnamon, bay leaf, honey, orchid, rose, clove and celery seeds; base notes are opoponax, patchouli, myrrh, cedar, musk, oakmoss, ambergris, agarwood (oud) and immortelle.

Amouage Says

Jubilation 25 was created to celebrate the 25th anniversary of the house of Amouage. It is enigmatic, elegant and captures eternity. It will appeal to the sophisticated woman (there goes my sophisticated status!).

Melissa Says

“Amouage Jubilation 25: People rave about this; goes from sweet to "animalic & quot; to soft sweet. Very complex.”

Oshin Says

This is no cause for Jubilation! After 25 years of killing people with strong smelling “perfume” I would expect them to get a clue! It was too spicy. My sinuses did not catch a break trying to expel it from my system. It should be called abomination 25 because it was a shame on so many levels!

Amouage Jubilation 25 promotional poster (courtesy of Google)

In summation, I have to think that Melissa’s olfactory perception is very tolerant! As a perfume novice to appreciate this extremity of opulent miasma. . . hats off! For a lover of fruity fragrances and a deliberate evader of floral fumes, this experience has been emotional as I have to cope with the loss of my sense of smell as mentioned abouve (when I said I’m mourning it). *sob! sniff! sniff!* Yes, Amouage has caused me to suffer anosmia! The silver frankincense lining here is that with the obliteration of my smell buds I can comfortably wear Amouage and cause others pain and turmoil without having to suffer myself MUAHAHAHAHA MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!

One thing that I do absolutely love about Amouage is the class of its branding and merchandizing. You can tell it’s a sophisticated brand. Expensive too what with a bottle going for round about 200 dollars! Kudos to the art director that worked on the promos for the perfumes because they are stunning! Well, apart from the Ciel one.

Melissa darling I thank you for sharing another of your interests with me. means a lot. Amouage did not destroy my appreciation for goodness enough to ignore the fact that you are sweet! Oh, by the way. as mummy is in love with them 9go figure!) sorry but doesn’t look like you’ll be getting them back. They are her Saturday night specials. hehehe. XOXO

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